Friday, June 08, 2007

Zombies do the darndest things

In the morning – and I use the term loosely - I drink coffee. Depending on my whims I drink either espresso or the freeze-dried stuff, either of which I take with sugar and cold milk.

Being in the middle of a string of night shifts, this morning I felt the need for something strong, so I put on a pot of espresso. While it was brewing on the stove I produced my favorite mug (the clown mug) from the kitchen cabinet and poured milk in it, and also two tablespoons of sugar.

With my motor functions set to autopilot I carried out these operations mechanically, as I often do, shuffling round the kitchen like the stinky, scratchy, bearded zombie in boxer shorts that I am. Easy girls, I’m spoken for. No really, back off. Seriously, stop calling me and leaving weird messages.

As the espresso pot started making that hissing noise, I looked down and noticed I was about to put instant coffee into the clown mug! My, oh my. My hands had obviously started making autonomous decisions without consulting the transcendent faculties. If I hadn’t caught them in time it would have made for one very strong cup of espresso.

Phew. Another disaster created and averted by my own brilliant self. I poured the freeze-dried stuff back in its container and grabbed the espresso pot. As I started pouring, it struck me as a bit odd that the liquid emerging from the metal snout was clear instead of, well, espresso-colored. On closer inspection it turned out to be in fact nothing but boiled water, as I had forgotten to put coffee in the pot.

So you see, if I'd left the instant coffee in the mug...

It's the story of my life. I can never be completely certain if I should try to correct my own mistakes or just let them even themselves out. This is why I check the stove three times before I leave the apartment. Now if I could only remember to put on some pants.


Blogger nadiac said...

that was such a cool story. Can you tell it again?

6:16 am  
Blogger Mikkel said...

Sure, here goes: I was fucking your mother up the ass and she loved it. The end.

12:46 pm  
Blogger Susanne said...

Sara, I *liked* this post, Sara!

10:12 pm  
Blogger Mikkel said...

That's what SHE said.

3:42 am  
Blogger nadiac said...

my mother is such a dirty dirty woman.

7:08 am  
Blogger Lasse said...

Den var fandema sjovt!

11:30 pm  

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