Tuesday, August 02, 2005

They never call

Dead people can be so annoying.

First of all, they’re arrogant. Once they’re dead, they just don’t make an effort anymore, they don’t take the time to nurture the relationship. You get the feeling they don’t care. They never call, they never write, they never pay back what they owe you. The only reason they get away with it is that they’re dead. It’s such a lame excuse.

Try to tell them these things and they just ignore you. They act all indifferent. What makes them think they are so important? They don’t contribute to society at all! That’s another thing that pisses me off. Let’s face it, dead people are slack. The minute they die they quit their jobs, just like that. It’s as if, just because they’re dead, suddenly they have no responsibilities.

Now they have all this spare time on their hands, and what do they do with it? Nothing. They don’t do anything. They hardly ever travel. They don’t get any exercise, and yet somehow they manage to stay slim. But then, you never see them eat or drink anything. It’s uncanny.

They have no sense of humor about it, either. They never even smile. They just lie there. It freaks me out.

Dead people, get with the program.

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Blogger MGL said...

they never call, they never sleep...

10:34 pm  
Blogger nick.moreno said...

For some reason, this reminded me of how much I HATE that kid from the Sixth Sense.

10:46 am  
Anonymous kamikaze-tomatoe said...

What would happen if I made my mum pregnant, blow my brains out and then get born again? Would I be considered dead-ish?

2:22 pm  
Blogger Mikkel said...

That's a tough one, mr. Quayle.

12:56 am  

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